100 Lotus Flowers

2009: 100 Lotus Flowers taking me through a transition in my life. Each flower is a message which brings me closer to the goal. I try to come to terms with myself, and be myself. What messages do the flowers hold?
2013: What is the goal? I no longer know what it is, except for reaching the 100. But the 100 was not supposed to be the goal itself, but rather help reach the.....the.....I am lost, honestly lost. Everything I was striving for has diminished in importance. I do not know what to strive for. I think striving for anything now is pointless....but I will keep drawing and painting.
2014: A renewed sense of purpose, things seem to be falling into place.

100 Lotus Flowers, 100 points of healing.

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Fifty - Eighth Lotus Flower - Connection to inner flame

There is a flame at my center. It keeps me warm in life. The are things that cause it to burn brighter, and things that cause it to die a little...inside.

I know the effects that some things bring....but I am still in the world...trying. To stop testing the effects that things out there have on your flame will surely cause it to die? Won't it?

When you stop trying, testing, experimenting....isn't that when the world falls around you and you sink into apathy?

....and isn't apathy painful?

Simply to exist, with no fire, no passion, no need or want for life.....doesn't it numb your soul?

Keep fanning the flame....reach out and test, try, experience. Yes, the flame may die sometimes, but sometimes it will grow.But to not try at all?

Well....it will most surely die eventually.

Fifty-Seventh Lotus Flower - How much growth does one need?Fifty-Seventh Lotus Flower

Fifty-Seventh Lotus Flower - Samantha Rochard
Growth....spiritual growth that is.

How much does one really need until we decide  "Enough."

Came upon the concept of Spiritual Gluttony the other day. It was an interesting term. I imagined someone consuming spiritual books and religious symbols and still wanting more.

Alchemists put forward that the right spiritual path changes one's spirit from mercury (base metal, base body) to gold (purer matter).

Is spiritual growth linear? Or is it some Mandelbrot function spreading out from one's essence exponentially....repeating patterns over and over and over?

Maybe I think too much?

Fifty-Sixth Lotus Flower - Does Growth bring change? Or does change bring growth?

Fifty-Sixth Lotus Flower - Samantha Rochard
Not sure how or when it happens.....all I know is I look back and realize things have changed a little bit, My perspective has shifted. I am a little different inside.
But which comes first to cause the other? Or do both dance around each other.

I know newness for me brings new vision. New thoughts, new topics, new location, new people, new minds......its like my world has opened up and is a little bigger.

I seek this constantly....that feeling of expansion.

Fifty-Fifth Lotus Flower - The Worth of the Process

Fifty-Fifth Lotus Flower - Samantha Rochard

A close friend of mine likens life to traveling on the bus.

I can understand. He sometimes asks about goals....when you achieve them, then what.

I believe the importance is in the journey, not the destination. When I create, the process of creating is more important than the final piece. Its the transformation that you undergo, the little things you see, smell, feel along the way that matter.
Its the renewed commitment to see it through, to stick with it. Whether it be relationship, project, goal...its the process that changes you, not the completion of the goal.

Its the willingness to pick another path on the journey to explore, and see more, feel more.
Its the things you see on the journey, not the destination.