I seem to exist in cycles. A wise person close to me, said: " If you keep doing the same thing over and over again, and expect different results- then thats clearly a sign of madness." I am not sure if he was quoting someone, but indeed it opened my eyes to the fact that I kept making the same mistakes, and wondered why I was not getting where I wished to be.
The Lotus Flower has been a reoccurring symbol in my life. I remember my first awareness of it at a school field trip. Molly Gaskin-a conservationist on an island in the time when it was thought to be odd- stood at the head of the group and pointed out the Lotus Flowers growing out of a murky muddy pool. "Out of that muddy, dirty, black pool, comes one of the most beautiful flowers in the world."
Later, I would begin to notice that the Lotus Flower was around me all the time. Every Divali time it emerges with the Goddess Latschmi, a symbol of good triumphing over evil.
Can my inner self ever be foremost? Is it possible to just live the real me, and not have to "conform" to other peoples' realities?
The exploration of different manifestations of each Lotus Flower starts from the simple square. The square, in esoteric studies, symbolizes the material earth. The circle represents divinity. Can I exist, my circle inside the square, trapped within never meaning to shine? It seems that around me, whether out of fear, or seeming wisdom; I am counselled to let my light hide behind the trappings of a "reality" that the world has created and others follow.
Have we been fooled? Have we been tricked into chasing paper? Existing simply to pay bills, in a lifeless existence which has been accepted by all? To store up object upon object and grow fat in ignorance caused by this instant gratification driven world?
Our contribution to life should be one that is approached with vigor, and love, and the willingness to rise every morning and contribute our hearts to the improvement of humanity.
Our Talents need to be channeled in this direction, for the upliftment and improvement of humanity.
My Lotus experiment has a few limitations. The square must be 15 cm square. There must remain a circle as well within the boundaries. Divinity is always confined by the manifest until it is released in death- unless we can find a way to expand divinity beyond our limitations. I must create 100, as it is a number which signifies both an end and a beginning. (and 10 would have been too easy).
(NB - As I reached the 13th Lotus flower I came upon research that indicates the Lotus flower was actually used by Egyptians to depict the number 1000! Yes...it was tempting to shift the final number from 100 to 1000 but that would have been just plain ridiculous)
The subject must be the Lotus Flower. By creating this starting point, I am actually creating a platform from which my imagination can fly. I am forcing my brain to find creative ways to use what I have, to create a beauty which may lead me to gold.
The task is my meditation, my medium of transformation.
Journey with me.
Added June 3rd 2012
After sticking at what I thought may be the last Lotus Flower at 47 (unable to produce for six months), a new revival in the project has hit me. Could it be that I have cast off a profession that had become boring? Could it be that I am now in a larger more comfortable space? Could it be that I have captured a sponsor, which has given me the financial means to stock up on supplies and perhaps push the flowers in a new direction.
Not wanting the parameters to change too much I decided to celebrate my sense of expansion, by expanding my size limitations.
Why not change other parameters? Because it is by working within limitations that true creativity is tested. It forces you to look at the problem in new ways and try to create something unique with what is available.
This project was meant to test my limitations, test my ability to work within boundaries, a sort of challenge to myself because I abhor limitations and boundaries.........I need to learn to live with them, and make the best of what I have at my disposal.
Onward to the next Lotus Flower!
Added October 2014
Many times I thought I would be unable to continue. To gain renewed sense of purpose, I relaxed the parameters a bit, and with the extra space, I got a bit more creative.
I like the direction from #59- 63, this I am saying on 20th October 2014. I am even considering some large square canvases for the final 20.
Lets see how it goes.
I terms of personal development I must say that I have been gaining a greater sense of inner peace.
I have become more in tune with me! And my needs, and my happiness.
I have begun to have moments where I feel a wash of contentment about the direction my life is going. Sweet!
Added December 2014
Coincidence or synchronicity?
Today I found reference to Carl Jung's studies and his use of mandalas as a healing tool. I had forgotten about mandalas. Which I had looked at years ago. Our minds connect dots in mysterious ways, and bits and pieces of our psyche bubble up without our consciousness realizing it. Perhaps I should leave some black and white colour pages to be downloaded?